Free Elly Now

I guess I'm just a Lucky So and So

2012-02-20T00:04:00.001-08:00

Hello Nicholas,

It was ChristopherHitchens who said that Cognitive Dissonance was actually crucial forsurvival. For instance: the racist, who believes whites are aseparate species meant to dominate all other 'human species', stillhas to reckon with the outside world full of those who do not sharehis views nor fit neatly into his ideas.

But I'd also add thatwe all bear delusions as well, no less crucial. Not out of survival,but to keep in our bellies a conviction that we actually wantto survive. A cognitive dissonance occurs when we notice the delusionbut do not take any opportunity to contest its presence in our minds,for the sake of survival.

I contacted you becauseI'm deluded in the way I just described. The idea that you won'tblock, delete (rinse and repeat) until I'm sponged-bathed out of existence, and out of yourpresence online or in your memory is wildly unlikely. Butit is that kind of wild unlikeliness, that grandiose absurdity, whichholds itself to my mind. In fact, right now, I'm listening to “TonyBennet – I'm just a Lucky So and So” when we can both be inagreement that I'm not.

The pleasant psychosisis as follows: I'm hoping that you'll untie Gordion's Knot; I'mhoping you'll respond to my bizarre and elaborate attempts to contactyou (in spite of our horrific blunder of contact in the past) and notwith irritation and bewilderment but with compassion and a genuineinterest in me too (and so the absurdity mushrooms). I'm hopingyou'll see me now, meet me in my apartment, see that I am more than Iever was when you knew me. See that, despite the clumsy bloodshed ofmy upbringing, I've become something you might take an exception for.By this point, we have to admit, the sheer absurdity of this idea isat levels more threatening than if you bathed in the heavy water ofthe Fukishima plant.

I'd want us to meet upif you still lived in London, in Greenwich – ground zero for where these handfuls of sorrow began – and that you will of your own free-will kiss me squarely on the lips. That's where it stops abruptly, thethought, the fiction - the bomb-wielding freight train gone-wild heading for anorphanage of blind children – that's when it stops, abruptly.

Living life isimportant but what's more important to me is knowing I've takenenough of these wild thoughts seriously, and acted on them enough toknow I'd never have to plaster, “No Regrets” on my tombstone (theline only those with regrets are inspired to put on theirtombstones). If you did kiss me, if someone I thought was outstandingly perfect kissed me, from that moment forth I'd be able to die in the knowledgeit wasn't all an utter waste of my time. Not existing in a greatexpanse of eternity is time-consuming and blissful, and so if not existing is tobe interrupted so I can be violently forged in a universe where thereis no justice, no redemption and no chance of evading serioussuffering, then all I have left is the sordid idea somebody mightwant to kiss me, the ever-tormenting notion that person might have beenyou. And I'm sure there are other cute bastards out there who woulddrive me completely mad just as much as the sight of you does andeverything you've got to say, but those are only rumours.Requited-love is an urban legend; spotting someone in the rush-hoursprawl of the masses that you might want to love is an urban legendno more likely than spotting Christ in burnt toast. To be fair Inever check, I smear it in a niqab of butter and eat the fuckingtoast.

And so goes therattling drumsticks of a supreme Fantasist, unable to consider theparallel Universe he actually occupies, which is far more bleak, farmore terrifying to him. Instead, choosing to submerge and snorkelhimself in the porridge of fantasy and complete delusion. It's pathetic, butit provides me with more relief than I could buy without aprescription knowing you will never want to know me again.

Bye

Sean Penn, "Aló Presidente!"

2012-02-14T08:47:00.000-08:00

The road to Hell ispaved with good intentions, and the folly of Sean Penn has allowedhim to install his own speed bumps and disabled parking. Apparentlyhe has met with the Government of Argentina and sided with them onthe topic of the Falkland Islands.

The claim Argentina hasmade over the Falkland Islands is on the basis it's on theirdoorstep, so it must be theirs. They also imply that any territorialgains made during the time of the British Empire are unlawful simplybecause Britain was an Empire.

But 'Malvinas' hasnever been under Argentinian Sovereignty, ever. On that basis, whydoesn't it claim the right to Chile its western neighbour as well?Argentina, for all its protestations of anti-imperialism, has beensending pregnant scientists to Argentine Antarctica in preparationfor the now, impending, dissolution of the Antarctic Treaty Systemthat keeps the continent symbolically the equal property of allPeoples. They believe once the time arises they'll be able to claimthat certain Argentinian citizens are actually AntarcticanNationality also. So much for the moral highground on Malvinas Day.

Accusing Britain ofimperialism in South America is a farce. For starters, Sean Penn wasonly a few years ago fraternising with the Dictator Hugo Chavez. Theman who in the nineties tried to install himself as Dictator ofVenezuela using sections of the military. It failed, so a decadelater he gave democracy a try; democracy for him was an afterthought.But that didn't matter to our Sean in his endless disgust for hisAmerican citizenship that too often leads him to unwisely judge thetyranny of actual Dictatorships to be much more palatable.

If Sean Penn takes thisstance, perhaps he'd like to inform the islanders on the Falklandsthat they are in fact Argentinian and in the closet about it? Why notgo to Hawaii and ask why 'Hawaiian' is registered as a foreignlanguage? And on the topic of imperialism in the New World, whydoesn't he mention the huge plot of land France still controls inSouth America (French Guiana) that uses the Euro nearly four thousandmiles away from Europe?

Sean Penn's endlesssense of outrage at the West leads him into the arms of Dictators, Fascists and covetous Governments that believe they deserve a couple ofislands merely because they're there, they're close, and by the way, there'sgas and oil. And after visiting Saddam's Iraq and theocratic Iran in an effort to appear deeply concerned with what isright or wrong, he just merely ends up adding Psychopaths with narcissistic tendencies tothe list of people he can call his friends.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/video/2012/feb/14/sean-penn-backs-argentina-falklands-video?newsfeed=true

My Abanico Spruce Guitar

2012-01-31T04:46:00.001-08:00

http://abanico-guitars.co.uk/Abanico-Guitars/

If you're strugglingwith bar chords and the nylon strings have managed to tear valleysthrough the dough of your skin, that's all right mate, you just havea shit guitar. The difference between the Abanico spruce guitar andmy plywood guitar is the difference between a kelachnikov and aspear. The spruce guitar is noticeably smaller in size than myplywood one, but you wouldn't be able to tell by the sound – a verybeautiful sound that's just as loud but much sharper.

Bar chords, which I wasstruggling so much with was a thousand times harder with my cheapplywood instrument. I was starting to question if classicalguitarists that move so effortlessly from a bar chord to another weresomehow blessed with inhuman finger strength. But no, your concernsas a beginner guitarist just might be down to the quality of yourinstrument. I would strongly recommend an Abanico guitar because it'sa thing of beauty and although it was made in China like myplywood one, they could never be comparable. The whole thing is alight, beautiful, machine that I'll be obsessing over now for a longtime. Classical songs that I was punishing myself over are mucheasier now and the sound is more classical, more elegant. The plywoodthing in comparison has Chinese slave-labour camp written all over it –but the spruce Abanico the small hands of child-slave-labourers couldnever craft. It's in China, but the people who make it know what they're doing.

Not to mention the caseis lovely, with the dark blue material covering the interior and theease of handling; travelling with it won't feel like the polyesterbin bags you get with cheap guitars. Also, I must also mention thestrings and the tuning pegs on the headstock are very elegant andeasy to tune with too.

The customer servicefrom Abanico Guitars was very professional. The owner is a verywell-trained guitarist absolutely obsessed with them – a traitevery one should look for in a business selling an instrument youwant to be equally as passionate about as well. He was very prompt,answered any of my questions and on a working week you can expect toreceive your purchase in less than 48 hours, seemingly regardlessof distance in England. Good job. The delivery man was a bit intimidating, his lack of hair and slightly soulless stare made you want to reach for your prized Ming dynasty vase on the table and smash it over him to afford you enough time to escape - but crisis averted - I was overreacting again.

Finally, if you're serious aboutplaying and want to remain that way, especially if you'reself-taught, then don't languish with some nylon stringed piece offirewood, I'd recommend buying from Abanico Guitars. Once you starttaking music seriously, you have to be sure you're getting what youexpect. And an expert on the things' is where you should be heading,not a guitar in some music shop in Camden whose strings theaggressive, Albanian owner has probably flossed with.

The Genius Loci

2012-01-30T19:24:00.001-08:00

I seem to only beattractive to members of the third world, like that guy from Somaliaor Paco in Mexico. Or, of course, paedophiles in Pennsylvanialowering the bar a bit and going for an oldy like me (23). I'm sureto them I'm fucking hot – a hunk even! But frankly that thoughtmakes me sick.

To everyone else, Imust be a ball of slime, a mythical creature hired by some greekgoddess who needs her magpie-love of silverware and useless gold shitguarded for eternity; an abomination that Mothers' mention to theirkids to get them to go to sleep at night.

I don't know what I'll be doing in the future, most likely I'll still be alone having neverexperienced not once, what requited love feels like. In fact, I canscuttle love. I'd settle for a meaningless mutually-felt crush thatleads to a sexual experience I won't need hypnotherapy to suppressfrom my memory (which later resurfaces in the form of uncontrollablefacial ticks).

I tend to attract thefreaks, the morbid, unintentioned creations of scientists seeking acure for rabies but who ended up having sex with the sassy interninstead. Life after dusk is something I'll never know and couplinghas never been my forte, so I guess I'll see you when I'm forty.

Syria's Lunar Eclipse

2012-01-29T11:53:00.001-08:00

Ban Ki Moon occupiesthe post of head of the UN – a now defunct organisation seeminglyonly used now for mounting economic sieges against countries we don'tlike, and for lending an air of normalcy to 1^st Worldindifference towards nations in famine, war zones or in the middle ofan AIDS epidemic.

And today, Ban Ki Moon,thanks to the coverage of the Syrian Army fighting fierce gun battlesin Damascus, was obligated again to make another meaninglessstatement babbling about how Assad should stop the killing, breathedeeply and count to ten. More rhetoric to excuse the deafeningsilence of war machines we have, that could rightly cripple Assad'sforces and rob Syria from the clutch of Putin's Russia. I see noreason why we should coquettishly hide behind a Japanese fan at theslightest accusation from Russia that we, the West, are interested inthe regime-change of nations we don't like. In my opinion, a NATO ledregime-change of a Dictatorship in comparison to one instigated byRussia is all the difference between a sex-change in an operatingtheatre and one performed in a dusty hotel room. I speculate thatbribes, conflicting personal interests of politicians eyeing theiropinion polls and showing concern with the label 'warmongering' arewhat is truly stumping a great opportunity to push Russian influencefurther back into the Caucasus.

I have no loyaltytowards the American Empire, but it's an Empire that at least inprinciple values liberty, equality, peace and the value of humanlife. If I could choose, out of Russia, China, India, America andEurope – the American Empire would be my second choice. I don'tview myself as left or right or western – I view myself asoccupying a misty spot on a hill with an old wooden sign that readsin worn, black letters: “The Moral High Ground.” You see, theMoral High Ground doesn't just have to be a place to launch asplendid defence against an attack in an argument – it also makes awonderful homeland as well.

A case in point:according to the Wikileaks Cables released last year, Ban Ki Moon wasthe victim, as were others across the political spectrum in manynations, of theft of their DNA by the CIA. Much to my surprise littlefuss was made of it by the Press and this Security-General said anddid little more about it. I wouldn't be surprised if Ban Ki Moon nowvoluntarily sends urine samples to Langley. The schlemiel has noballs, just a scrotum for CIA agents to keep their car keys in. He'sa spineless, coward. A puppet masquerading as sentient life not evenashamed any more to reveal the strings holding him up. Hearinganother strongly-worded letter to Assad on the news makes me sick.The personal interests of politicians worried about opinion polls andthe label of warmongering, are what is crippling this opportunity tospread democracy and Western influence in the middle-east. This inaction willbe our undoing.

Man's Obsession with Blood and Sacrifice

2012-01-28T15:11:00.001-08:00

Our obsession, even inmodern times, with the value of a human sacrifice is stupendous.Because the death of a human being naturally causes us so muchemotional turmoil we make the unwise guess that reality itself sharesour concern, and if given enough persuading, will be moved just asmuch as we are by the pathetic, sudden extinction of another humanbeing.

Picture this: successive earthquakes shake a small seafaring society on an islandin the Aegean, it's advanced for its time but the geological eventsshake out the most ardent religious extremism in every one.Archaeologists retrace, from the evidence, some of the events thatoccurred. There is evidence of ritualistic cannibalism and a youngboy is drained of his blood on an altar, his blood is collected intoa clay vase and in an elaborate ritual forms an offering to appeasethe Gods, who are capricious and evidently hard-to-please with veryacquired tastes.

Eventually theearthquakes lead to one of the most destructive events ever tothreaten human beings: the Minoan Eruption on the island of Santoriniwhich not only created a hole in the island but also severaltsunamis, several, and a global dip in temperature thwarting thegrowing of vegetation as far away as Ireland.

Archaeologists studyingthe remains of one man, believed to be a priest, retrace events.Another young person (or the same boy) was butchered for the Gods andtheir blood harvested for offering. It seems when the Minoan Eruptionbegan the Priest started the ritual to the Gods with the vase of theboy's blood, in a vane effort to save his Society. When the buildingcollapsed he was crushed, failing to finish the complex ritual torescue his people from the brink of complete oblivion. Above that,the entire place is preserved in a thick layer of ash.

After the events thatshook both Crete and Santorini, the ancient Peloponnese Greeksexploited the weakened state of the Minoans and invaded, finishingoff the survivors and extirpating their civilisation completely.

Fast-track to moderntimes, Justin Bieber, a huge pop-icon for us in the second decade ofthe newest millennium, is inspired by a young girl's story to ask histwitter followers to offer up their blood and organs to him in aneffort to end the shortage of donor transplants, and presumably, tosave our civilisation from the brink of total destruction as well.

http://www.thestar.com/article/1122824--justin-bieber-to-the-rescue-on-lung-transplant

How Hard can it Be? Torturous.

2012-01-26T08:41:00.000-08:00

A review of the book, "Josh and Me, How hard can it be?" by Richard M. O'Bryan.

http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/josh-and-me-richard-m-obryan/1108056647?ean=9781462070251&tabname=custreview&#TABS

I'm not sure if this is a book meant for children or adults,it fails as both or either. The book is written from the perspective of a tenyear old child, yet too often veers off into a cultural reference thatobviously isn't that of the character's mind, but of the author's. Talkingabout something innocuous and befitting a child but then going off on apolitical tirade about 'public committees' leaves the reader wincing at thepoor form of the writer.

The intimacy between the two boys, especially when they'reconstantly telling each other they love each other before bedtime, makes youfeel altogether uncomfortable. The book too often reads like it was the fantasyof a Pederast, Log Cabin Republican. The fantasy's intended purpose is tocreate a story of two quintessentially white-american, Christian boys living ina world that doesn't have blacks, poverty or television, but without wanting todraw attention to this fact. I think it fails, and I think what has caused thisbleaching of the story has been in part the Author's lack of imagination, hisurge to create a world where his political preferences are fully-realised andan unhealthy fixation with pre-pubertal innocence.

Sometimes the sheer banality of the childrens' adventuresbecome so strikingly absent of any real color that one questions whether theAuthor ever had a childhood at all. This absence of any, even superficial,threat or intrigue makes the book very dry. The characters are only distinct bytheir names and physical descriptions; no noticeable personality ever seems toarise from any of the characters -and no bad guys exist in this world. In manyways the characters seem lobotomised. The sacrifices the Author has made inobdurately maintaining the purity and innocence of what he thinks childhoodshould be ultimately clips the feathers in there being any possibility of acompelling childrens book here. It tries, unashamed, to live up to such amythology of a truly innocent Childhood that you half expect the whole thing tobe a joke, and the first letter of each chapter to form the words, "Iworship Satan" --at least that would make this nightmare of somebody'sperfect world justified for its existence.

In short, I felt reading this was coming close to realisingjust what Hell must be like. With platitudes hanging from the rooftops, tenyear old boylove and a merciless absence of anything deeper than a ReligiousConservative's titwank with his own version of a perfected society, you areleft feeling that people shouldn't be recommended this book, people you don'tlike should be condemned to it. It's an atrocity on your time.

Africa's Refuseniks (No, I don't want to bathe, read & write and use condoms)

2012-01-25T08:59:00.000-08:00

I've been thinkingabout several topics to make my next blog post about, but this onewas shining at me from the bottom of the pile. It's a humanitariancrisis that has just ensued in South Sudan that perfectly reflects myprevious blog's sentiments on human behaviour.

The Lou Nuer tribe hasvowed to completely exterminate every single member of the MurleTribe, both women and children, because they say the Murle Tribestole cows from them. 120,000 people have been displaced, around 3000are said to already be dead, and certainly, some of them are womenand children.

Now the HumanitarianAid organisations have vowed to pick up the pieces, scrambling toprovide medical assistance to the wounded and shrieking at the West,like an Arab shawl-dressed widow, for more money, all the while noone has any intention of discussing the root cause of the war. Theroot cause is we have a group of people who we allow to think and behave like ourprehistoric ancestors, but who are armed with 20^th centuryassault weapons. The penalty of being this dumb today is more vast, and it's scope of victims more dense.

I'm growing tired ofthe Left's insistence that the biggest threat to World peace arethose Nations, including my own, that have borne and produced theorganisations, the technology and the concepts of human rights thatchampion the meek of this planet. All the while those Nations thatsummarily execute baby boys in the street, get their hands shaken bythe likes of George Galloway (who praised Bashar Al-Assad prior tothe Arab spring) and Noam Chomsky who only now is reversing hisstance on Dictator Hugo Chavez. Sure, Hugo was elected – but onlyafter trying to force his way into public office with the use ofsections of the military. For him, democracy was an afterthought.

And Russia, the applein the eye of Westerners who follow the news broadcaster 'Russia Today', whilst condemning the US, continues to send missiles and advanced light aircraftto Syria right at a time when the slaughterhouses of Syria areoverflowing with the newly dead.

And Africa? I don'tbelieve Food-Aid is enough and I don't believe that Charities aretruly as conscientious with our money as they'd like us to believe.I think that unless you're building roads, improving literacy,sanitation and the like, then it's pointless. The UN sponsored thebuilding of a sports stadium in Kabul when most of Afghanistan was still under Taliban control. The most poverty stricken nation that neededan oil-pipeline, roads, infrastructure and schools, instead gets asports stadium that the Taliban quickly put to use as a place forpublic executions.

Saudi Arabia a fewyears back executed a man for witchcraft. This is why I believe weshould realise tyranny springs from an altar of stupidity andcredulity, the likes of which only, religion, ignorance and nationalism can gift you. The right to an education is a human right,but the right to bar your countrymen from receiving one is not ahuman right – and we have allowed this social experiment of livingside-by-side those who want to continue living in the past for longenough. We should drag these petulant tribesman kicking and screaminginto the 21^st century, snap their spears, hand themmonogamy and universal suffrage, and tell them the good old days ofbeing able to behave like savages are over. Because your petty gamesare starting to threaten millions, and in the case of nuclear-armedNorth Korea, perhaps the entire World.

http://www.reuters.com/article/2012/01/20/us-sudan-south-tribal-idUSTRE80J0ZT20120120

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=B5xxCwkI_a8#!

Car Bombs 16th January 2012

2012-01-16T04:42:00.000-08:00

How many terrorist organisations from every curve of the political spectrum have taken up car bombs? As though in the process of a bomb detonating and tearing limb from limb, something like the serenity one finds in human rights and democracy can be gathered up like logs of firewood from the pointless misery that then ensues.

In most cases I find that people that take up these practices have absolutely no interest in winning. They don't want, under any circumstances, to lose a situation where blatant sociopathy is pardoned by the sane majority. A situation only brought about by war.

Car bombs are picking up in tempo in Iraq since the full withdrawal of US troops. And the President of Iraq, seems to be picking off political opponents with trumped-up charges of death squads. The truth is everyone in that Government were commissioning death squads. I doubt that country can segway from Arab-Styled Stalinism to sparkling vestiges of Democracy easily, if at all.

I don't know why people are prepared to overlook the lumbering elephant in the room: that in most instances their actions are encouraging chaos and the worsening of an ill-society, not nursing it back to health. From my Island off the coast of France, via Reuters and Human Rights Watch, it appears that your country, Iraq, is violently convulsing. And each fibre of its being is a politician drunk on the fruit of fresh bribes, and the judicial process an arbitrary lie, made casually to ring in the ears of innocent men to be marched off to hell.

Your entire system is the whore of Babylon, leprous and vile – and proud of it. Religion has made sane men look at other sane men with insane suspicion. Shia, Sunni – all ridiculous labels for a religion no less flawed than all the others that make men calve up their own disabled country. If you are a religious dissident or corrupt official, I say to you that you are a merchant of slime; a mortician covered in the gore of his countrymen, and what disgusts me more is behind your feigned religious conservatism, you love it.